In the videos she posts on her TikTok account, Victoria Morse’s life looks ethereal.
Here she is leaning into her stay-at-home mom, or #sahm, era in a long dress and straw hat, feeding her 17-month-old daughter outside in the grass surrounded by flowers. They are riding bikes, blowing bubbles outside, and as she puts it, putting the stress of chores aside in pursuit of making memories. She’s cooking with her baby on her hip, bathed in the glow of a soft light.
“Sure, I got the job,” Morse, 33, wrote on one video. “I climbed the ladder. I made the money. I bought the things, I impressed the people, I became the breadwinner. But this is still the greatest achievement. Everything else is just stuff.”
This is Morse’s new life after leaving her corporate job. It’s a huge shift, one she tells me she’s thrilled to be finally embracing.
“My hope is to build something that’s both creatively fulfilling and flexible, one that supports my family and allows me to be fully present as a mom, because that’s the best job of all,” she tells me.
Prior to becoming a mother, Morse’s life followed a clear path, one that many millennial women tread beside her. She pursued a career, in her case in design, with passion and hard work. She was, as the TikTokers say, a full-on corporate girlie, following the example of the girlboss era and charging ahead, assuming she would one day “have it all” as a wife, mother, and career woman. At just 10 weeks pregnant, she signed her unborn child up for day care waiting lists, assuming she’d pick up where she left off after her parental leave.
She had her daughter in spring 2024, and then five months later, she was laid off. To Morse, it was a radical shift in perspective. She realized that her priorities had changed.
“I realized how little I wanted to be a part of a place that prioritized ‘the bottom line’ over people’s well-being,” she says. “Becoming a mother highlighted how misaligned it all felt. I didn’t want to spend my best energy behind a screen in meetings that didn’t fulfill me, then come home with nothing left to give my daughter and my passion was lost.”
If you’re a young mother, Morse’s story may feel familiar. To many millennial and Gen Z women, one thing is becoming clear—we were sold a lie. In a country where we have no paid leave, no support for exorbitantly high childcare costs, and are increasingly being forced back into rigid and strict corporate office environments, many mothers of young kids are reaching their breaking points.
Amid the reality of our situation, many women are espousing a new dogma. It’s time, they say, to reclaim #SAHM life as one that is modern, powerful, and intentional, rejecting the antiquated stigmas associated with the choice. The question they are asking is: Are you mom enough to stay home? Or in other words, are you ready to reject the system we have been forced into, to create the life you want for yourself and your kids?
