I’ve always struggled with my self-image, from the way I look to how people perceive me. Developing psoriasis didn’t exactly help with that internal dialogue.
I began noticing symptoms when I was around 20, back in 2020. It started with my scalp feeling itchy. As the sensation intensified, I began constantly scratching, and scab-like flakes would fall from my head and get caught in my then-long brown hair. I later learned these were psoriasis plaques.
You could see them all over my clothing, too, so much so that I stopped wearing anything dark and stuck to whites and light colors because I didn’t want the flakes to be visible. When I was out with other people, I’d even walk at the back of the group so no one would see the buildup collecting on the back of my shirt.
As time went on, my scalp was always itchy. I couldn’t stop touching it or scratching it, and it became so irritated that it would bleed at night.
I don’t remember exactly when I was officially diagnosed. But what I do remember is, when I first started experiencing symptoms, Googling whether adults could get cradle cap because I had no idea what was happening. As my symptoms got worse, I found myself showering multiple times a day to wash away the plaques, but it didn’t help. Eventually, I went to my general practitioner (GP) because it seemed to be spreading across my entire scalp. The doctor spent no more than five seconds looking at my head before telling me I had psoriasis. Sure, it was relieving to finally have an answer, but at the same time, I left with a diagnosis of an incurable autoimmune disease and very few answers about what came next. My GP told me to see a dermatologist, but that was really it.
I learned that stressful events can sometimes bring autoimmune diseases like psoriasis to the surface. As a paramedic and emergency-call taker, I spend my days helping people through incredibly stressful situations, so perhaps that was one of my triggers. Unfortunately, I’ll never know for sure.
After a while, the plaques weren’t just on my head. The psoriasis showed up on my hands, which made working incredibly painful and challenging because I was constantly washing my hands and wearing gloves while treating patients. Later it spread to my knees, elbows, and stomach too.
