I don’t know if it’s strange, but I went to the movies with him a couple of times. The first time I went was to watch Guardians of the Galaxy. It was just him and me. It was 3D, and he sat on the chair next to me, and I put 3D glasses on him, and he sat there watching it for five minutes, and I just couldn’t stop laughing. I couldn’t focus on the movie. He’s just sitting there, he’s watching. You could tell he is so confused. And then he passed out on the chair, and he was snoring the whole movie. And everyone in the theater was laughing because you could hear him snoring loud.
If you could tell your dog one thing, what would it be?
So here’s a funny story: His trainer took him to see a medium, and she sent me a voice note of this whole story that this medium told. He said that all Roscoe wants is some bacon because he’s been plant-based for seven years. So I would say, “I’m really sorry that I’m not giving you any bacon.”
What is the most human thing your dog does?
Farts. He farts a lot. Well, not a lot. I would say when we’re in the mountains or high up, it happens to all of us. Or he sleeps on his back. He sleeps on my bed, and he is literally on his back like a spring chicken, like a turkey. And I have to kick him out in the middle of the night because he is snoring so much. It is like your best friend snoring—you have to kick him like, Hey, stop snoring. And he stops for a second and then goes back into it.
What is the most dog thing your dog does?
He loves rolling around in the mud.
Photographed by Sulay Kelly
What is your full name?
Roscoe Carl Davidson Hamilton
Astrological sign?
Scorpio
Favorite toy?
Squeaky balls. I go nuts over a ball, but I especially love bowling balls and footballs. I have a little bit of that bull trait in me, and I won’t stop until I pass out when I have a ball.
Favorite meal?
Breakfast on Christmas morning, watermelon, and pineapple. I love pancakes like my dad, and our favorite flavor is blueberry. And clearly bacon, but I haven’t had it in a long time.
Worst habit?
My dad has to wear earplugs because I snore and shake the bed. He tells me it’s cute, though.
Strangest habit?
I pick up my dad’s bougiest trainers (I love his Dior ones in particular), and I love to put my head down on them. I never, ever chew the shoes because I am not that kind of dog but just like to rest my head on shoes. I also only poo on grass, but good grass and only when no one is watching. I can’t have my dad standing next to me when I poop.
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